Tuesday, January 03, 2006

I have crossed over to the Dark Side

To all my friends and family in North Dakota and Minnesota, where people know what cold is, I apologize. I have let you down. I have turned over to the Dark Side. I have become one of THEM.

Yes, in those cold climes we have a saying, "The cold keeps the riffraff out." Now WHO, exactly, is the riffraff? I am not sure, never have been, but by golly, we do NOT want them in North Dakota or Minnesota. We are proud of our cold -- proud of the hearty, hardy people we are. Cold? Naw, it ain't cold right now! Forty degrees in February? That isn't COLD, people, that is a HEAT wave. We wear T-shirts on a 40 degree F day in February. That's cause for celebration.

But I am a Californian now. Well, I still tell people here I'm from "back East." (FYI: to a Californian, Nevada, that den of iniquity in the "wild, wild West," is "back East." How's that for perspective?)

I digress. I have lived in California for seventeen months now. And I am a wuss.

Certifiable.

Pathetic.

Yes, you heard it here first -- Jennifer is not going to survive a winter in Minnesota. She will freeze to death long before the thermometer dips below the magic 32F mark.

It is 54 degrees. It is cloudy and damp and depressing. And I am so cold I think my fingers are going to freeze solid and then tinkle delicately as they land on my keyboard. Or maybe they'll thud indelicately. I don't know, but the point is, people, I am COLD. And I'm thinkin' I need to find out exactly what will get me classified as Riffraff. A label like that could go a long way in keepin' me warm.

4 comments:

  1. Oh, you will be fine. I think the Bay Area is always cold and I live in Indiana and while we aren't as hearty as you folks--it gets f'ing cold here too.

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  2. Hey, it's been in the 30s here...we're having a mild one so far. It's possible you are already riffraff - did you consider that?

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  3. Sitting in Minnesota waiting for the BIG CHILL of the New Year. I went to the gym at 4:30 this morning and it was 27 and I just wore a tee...it was brisk but not too chilly, LOL. Jennifer, I can't believe you have moved over to the dark side, come on! Whether we like to admit it or not, we are NORTH DAKOTANS....equipped to handle it, now ask if we always like it? HELL NO!

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  4. Anonymous11:52 AM

    Hey Girl of Mine - you come from hearty stock and I know, as your mother, that you can DO ANYTHING and that includes wintering back here in the Land of Four Seasons. Besides, you need to be closer so I can see you and the grandsons a bit more often! Love You! Mom

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